Learning Fatherhood (5): Celibacy again.

"Learning Fatherhood" are reflections on Spiritual Fatherhood. They are not mature reflections on the theme and may be considered more "experiences" and meditations through which we come to Spiritual Fatherhood in the Priesthood. As a seminarian I know that this will be the identity and challenge I am called to take on especially in these last years of priestly formation.

Any given Sunday...

...you can find yourself walking as a Priest alongside a homosexual couple, sexually active youth, and parents. In the diversity that you can discover in the world - What is it that a celibate Priest brings into the arena of life?

2. The Purpose of Celibacy

Beyond the question of the "Rich Young Man" we discover another very sincere question: 

"What must I do to live Chastity today?:

It takes a lot and very little. First it takes Grace. Without it there is no purpose to begin with. It was only by grace that we discovered our calling. Second comes Desire.Without a desire to live Celibacy how could it possibly take root? But Why should I desire to be celibate? 

St. Paul speaks about the need to search out the things that are above, namely that of God's will:

If then you were raised with Christ, seek what is above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Think of what is above, not of what is on earth. (Col 3:1)

If Our Lord spoke of marriage as something pertaining only to this world (Cf. Lk 20) then it is a calling to seek that which is beyond. But what is this "beyond" if we're seek to fulfill our desires? On the other hand not everyone is called to it as Jesus says, "He that is able to receive it, let him receive it." (Mt 19:12). Paradoxically below we discover the same Pauline admonition but the other way around in Ecclesiasticus:

Seek not the things that are too high for thee, and search not into things above thy ability: but the things that God hath commanded thee, think on them always, and in many of his works be not curious. (Sir 3:22)

The treasure lies deep, very deep. Celibacy is a gift and mystery - a vocation. This calling launches the called to "launch into the deep" (Lk 5) and trust completely in God's Mercy and Providence yet to launch out requires a discernment to discover the call to celibacy. 

Celibacy (as life is) is a risk taken. There is no guarantee to live it out perfectly. We can only go into "the deep" trusting in the Mercy of God and seeking to do our best. In the Christian Life there are so many instances where we can also "walk on water". The Earth does not seem to be so firm - we don't feel all that secure - who's to say that the Apostles ever felt perfect? To that Jesus shouts, "Be not Afraid!"

Spanish seminarians between classes

The Beautiful and Celibacy

"Beauty so old yet so youthful, how late I have loved you" (St. Augustine, Confessions)

We naturally seek out the beautiful. If we don't it's because something is not right with us psychologically. It means that we are 'perverse' or 'perverted'. Each and every one of us has to make an effort to embrace the beautiful which transcends the where and the when of this Earth, to embrace the Divine and all his things. This is a life journey of the "pure of heart...who shall see God" (cf. Mt 5).

So what exactly does a Celibate Priest bring to the table? A Big Pure Heart Open to God. In the case of a homosexual couple, a sexually active college student, and married couple fighting to keep their marriage afloat a Celibate Priest can be a "Father" that  is hard to find in this Fatherless world. "To whom shall we go?" (cf. Jn 6:68)

Can I be Celibate and Happy? Yes. In the end it depends on God more than on me. On the other hand God is depending on me too. How can I respond? Seek out the treasure. How can I find it? the narrow gate. 

David Henrie with seminarians

Five Thoughts on the Priestly-Celibate Life: 

1. A Grand Devotion to Mary: The First Woman of our Lives
2. Learning to have good and healthy relationships with others - especially within the Priesthood.
3. Finding the special place or identity of "Spiritual Fatherhood" in the lives of those around you.
4. Thoroughly examining the relationships in place and purifying any sort of desire: "what's in it for me?".
5. Get to know the Female Genius, insist that women conserve it to live out a rich Spiritual Motherhood as their way of bringing souls to Our Lord.

Learning Fatherhood (4): Can I be Celibate...and Happy?

"Learning Fatherhood" are reflections on Spiritual Fatherhood. They are not mature reflections on the theme and may be considered more "experiences" and meditations through which we come to Spiritual Fatherhood in the Priesthood. As a seminarian I know that this will be the identity and challenge I am called to take on especially in these last years of priestly formation.

Isn't Celibacy a train-wreck waiting to happen? Take a young guy - sometimes good looking - and restrict him from a life without a life companion...and the "goods" of holy matrimony?...Aren't we being a bit immature, platonic...too much wishful thinking here? Hasn't past experience shown us that celibacy is - to say it realistically,"IMPOSSIBLE" ?

My answer to the question "Can I be Celibate and Happy?" is simple

"Yes"

and this is why:

To narrow down celibacy to "not having sex" would be to narrow down marriage to "having sex". This sad 'narrowing' of celibacy is perhaps significant in one of the ways  society is paralyzed - an immense sexual immaturity.

On the otherhand to narrow down the 'celibacy' question to just a question about maturity would also be immature. What can it then be narrowed down to? Perhaps it shouldn't be 'narrowed down'. Maybe we should widen our horizons to something big, grandiose - spacious and more expansive. 

To answer this question with some depth we have to answer two more questions: 

1. What does "celibacy" mean? What is its purpose?
2. What does it mean to be Happy?

1. The Meaning of Celibacy 

"Celibacy" according to the dictionary merely comes down to us from the latin "caelibatus" for "bachelor" or "widower". Doesn't this go exactly against what Pope Francis said about the identity of Religious and Priests? Aren't they supposed to avoid being "Confirmed Bachelors"?

In a mysterious context Jesus mentions that there are three kinds of "eunuchs" (cf. Mt 19:11-12) - castrated men usually used as slave-servants so as to keep noble lines pure of any slave blood. Jesus mentions that there are those "from birth", those who have been placed at the service of men (primary definition), and finally "and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake". 

Castration is ugly - really ugly. It seems like we've gone from bad to worse. Hasn't Jesus just said that in his religion there will be those "castrated"..."for the Kingdom of Heaven?"

The reading of the Gospel must be accompanied by the life of Our Lord. We infer through other readings such as the one about "plucking eyes out" (cf. Mt 5:29 which he mentions in the context of lustful glances) that despite the fact He worked copious miracles he never actually punished people (such as the 'adulterous woman' - cf. Jn 8) by "plucking out eyes" or "removing limbs". In fact, Jesus forgave, and that, uncommonly. The reading of the call to chastity by Jesus is one that is not 'literal' but 'figurative' but yet real because He lived it himself. 

Jesus was and is celibate. His Mother and Father were celibate. Voilá the first genetic mystery in the history of mankind (After Adam and Eve...how exactly they procreated the human race...let the Biologists figure it out...). This celibate Holy Family marks something - not vaguely different - but the biologically impossible. In the final analysis, we have to ask "Why did Jesus live celibacy?" (and connected to it "Why did the members of his family live celibacy?"). I think I have one answer:  

To be celibate means to live "Heavenbound".

Baptizing a new etymology - I would like to propose a grammatically incorrect etymology. "Celibate" (which comes from "caelibatus" in Latin) we could fictionally but yet meaningfully say comes from "caelum" + "batus" or "Heaven bath". It's incorrect but better suited for the intended meaning of "celibate" than caelibis meaning "Confirmed Bachelor". To be "celibate" should mean for us (the Christian sense) to be "bound for Heaven" or "Heavenbound" to be "born from above" (cf. Jn 3). To be bathed with the waters of baptism and yet transcend those same waters in and through grace. Fulton Sheen speaks about Celibacy as if it were as "travelling with a jet plane". The design of celibacy  in the Chrisitian world is the same as the one Jesus speaks of in the Next Life: "those who are considered worthy to attain to that age and to the resurrection from the dead neither marry nor are given in marriage" (Lk 20; Cf. also Mt 22; Mk 12). In celibacy we dare to take on the same design of life in Heaven - yet on Earth.

Priest Praying the Rosary

But it's not enough to want to get to Heaven to be celibate. Celibacy is tough. The 'Cross factor' is no doubt present (ask the writer - he can attest). Celibacy is by definition a project towards Heaven requiring great assistance. It is NOT just a Personal Effort. Jesus recommends that "those who can receive it do so" (cf. Mt 19:12). It is a particular calling and the grace to live it out is a gift - charism.

to be Continued...